How To Deal With One Way Love

As of late, I have heard quite a few people speak about being in love with someone who doesn't love them back in the same way, and it made me begin to think about how healthy a relationship like that really is.  I have to admit that in the past I have loved men that didn't reciprocate the love I showed them, and I gave from the depths of my heart just to be left hanging with nothing more than a typically generated "thank you." However,  from those situations I learned a lot about love and about how the other person in a relationship can view the situation.  The average person would look at the latter scenario and say that a person that stays in a relationship where the love is not equally reciprocated is foolish, but I believe that these types of relationships can be worked out into healthy ones if each person understands their roles in the relationship and where the other person stands as far as their emotions and what they want out of the relationship.

If your intentions in loving that person were to gain their trust and loyalty to make them love you, or to guilt them into staying because they feel obligated,  then you need to leave that relationship alone all together because it's not based on a good foundation of sincerity.  If this situation does turn into a relationship out of guilt, it won't last because it will be filled with constant arguments, infidelity and psychologically damaging tactics just to keep the person around.  You don't want to be the cause of someone's mental breakdown. LEAVE IT BE!

However,  if you love unconditionally without expectancy and because your heart feels compelled to do for this person because it's what you feel is right, then your heart is in the right place. Whatever your heart registers as truth is TRUTH. You can still love that person, but if they aren't interested in a committed relationship with you, then move on to someone who will be interested and keep that person as a friend that you can love from a distance.

If you are in a relationship where the love is one sided and the other person keeps taking from you and leaving you drained with nothing for yourself and never does anything to build you back up, LEAVE THAT RELATIONSHIP ALONE! Your love for that person blinds you from realizing that you are being used and not invested back into. Do yourself a huge favor and drop that relationship and run as fast and as far as your can!

If the status of what your relationship is with that person is clear and if you are confident and clear about how he or she feels about you, then there will be no confusion about what to expect back from that person. If he or she thinks highly of you, but the relationship is only on a friendship level, then he or she will keep things superficial with not much interaction past anything platonic (meaning no intimate affection). If you are comfortable with where you are with that person in your relationship, then let it be what it is. Don't listen to your girlfriends or your guys who tell you what your relationship with that person should be labeled as and what that person should be doing for you if you and the other person have already worked it out.  The outside opinions of those looking in often ruin something that is working well. Stay true to your version of the truth and keep your relationships just that...YOURS.


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1 Comment

  • Esma

    I think that fear of commitment is just BS. Most of the time the guy just ISN’T into that pacuritlar girl like that, so they use the commitment fear excuse to avoid keeping it real with the woman. In reality, it’s either 1. Look, I’m a man whore. And I can’t keep slayin these hoes if I’m tied down to YOU 2. Look, I like you enough to chill and have sex, but I can’t take you home to mom. Sorry But trust me, there’s always that ONE woman that’ll get that ONE guy sprung enough to commit

    September 12, 2015 Reply

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