As of late, I have been going on a lot of First Dates, and I decided, why not give some advice to my fellow ladies that are single and currently exploring their options. The first date is one that can be pretty intimidating, especially if you have a deep interest in the man you are about to see, but I am about to give you some tips that will hopefully ease some of your fears and create a lasting impression that will have him coming back for more. Here are a few quick DO's and DON'T for the first date.
DO: Be open and honest- Men can pick up on a fake personality just as fast as they can spot a bad weave. The first date will set the bar of expectation for what spending time with you in the future would be like, so you should be able to be as open and honest in conversation with your date as you would with your girlfriends. I wouldn't suggest going into deep details about your PMS or horrible first date stories, but you should be open enough to show him the real you and relaxed enough to let your hair down. The date is supposed to be fun...leave the stress and insecurity at home.
DO: Remain in the moment- As women, we have a tendency to drag every date through the "could he be the one" radar and over-complicate situations that are supposed to be simple. Don't think about what the future may hold for you and your beaux. Just live in the moment, have fun getting to know him and enjoy a wonderful evening together. If the first date goes well, you can guarantee there will be future encounters.
DO: Be Attentive- Men like to know that when they speak, they have an audience that is listening, but they love it even more when a woman actually seems interested in what he has to say. During conversation between bites, make sure you engage in eye contact while your date is speaking, and give gestures to let him know you are paying attention. Ask questions that relate to the subject of discussion and try to have an opinion on what is being discussed. Showing him that you are engaged will make him feel that you are genuine.
DON'T: Text, Tweet or Facebook- We live in a society today where we feel the need to document our every thought and movement on facebook and twitter, but a date is one of the most inappropriate times to do so. Whether you are on a social media network, or texting a girlfriend about the events of the night, you date will not know the difference and will assume you are more into whoever you are talking to on the phone more than him. Before going into the date, take the time to turn off your phone and put it into a secure place within your purse to refrain from checking your phone. Your date deserves your undivided attention.
DON'T: Bring up the EX- No man ever wants to be compared to your ex, and he definitely doesn't want to hear about what he did right or wrong. All of your focus should be on getting to know the new man in front of you and moving on. Talking about your ex will make him believe that you aren't over your last relationship and have no intentions of moving forward. If your date brings up the subject of your ex, simply decline that subject and move on to the next topic. Keep the focus on the here and now...your ex is an X for a reason.
DON'T: Over interrogate -First dates are always come with the game of 21 questions, but don't go over board on the questioning as if you are running down the list you have made for the Ideal Mate. It's ok to ask questions, but don't make him feel like he is under a heated lamp being questioned as if his life depended on it. To make sure you don't scare him away, slip in a question between subjects within the conversation to break them up. Introducing a new question at a different time will generate fresh conversation to help keep the date moving.