It's a known fact that women go out of their way to capture the attention and affections of a man. We keep our hair and nails groomed to perfection, we pay extra attention to our wardrobe to insure we are on trend and accentuating the parts of our body that are the most appealing, some beat their faces with makeup to mask flaws or to further highlight physical beauty and many work out to stay in top shape to compete. When it comes to personality, we try to put
on our best behavior, cater to his needs, cook, maybe clean and even give massages when he's had a bad day, but it seems that once a woman has secured her spot as the main chick and can now proudly represent the title of "girlfriend" or "wifey", all of the maintenance begins to trail off and the attitude and treatment begin to change.
I've spoke with dozens men over the course of my adult life who complain about how women begin to get lazy in relationships and don't put in as much effort as they once did while the courting stage was in effect. It causes men to lose interest when a woman doesn't take pride in her appearance and doesn't cater to his needs like she once did. The lesson to be learned in all of this is to make sure that you continue to do whatever it is that you did in the beginning to capture this man's heart throughout the entire relationship. Sure, it can become a bit difficult to keep up your appearance if you have had a baby and have little to no time to yourself, but you have to make time to continue to love on yourself and care for yourself so that your man can look at you with adoring eyes even if you have put on a little baby weight. He will adore you for making the effort to keep yourself looking good even though the sacrifices you made to bear his seed. Making sure that your man is satisfied in the bedroom and at the dinner table will keep him coming home with eager anticipation, and being a listening ear, a confidant and a cheerleader when he needs you will deepen your bond and friendship.
Don't become lazy and cast your man's desires to the side simply because the chase is over. Remember that he still has an ego that needs to be catered to and sexual needs. If you performed like a porn star when you first started engaging in sex, don't turn into Sally the Saint once he's given you the title. If you kept your appearance on the level of Beyonce when you met him, don't start trailing off and looking like Felicia from "Friday". Lessening your efforts in the relationship and becoming too relaxed in your responsibilities will cause your man to begin looking elsewhere to meet his needs, and you don't want any parts of infidelity I'm sure.
I know you're saying, "he has to continue to do the same things that he did to get me if I have to keep putting effort forward," and you are right! A relationship is supposed to be reciprocal, but it will only remain that way if you do your part and if you communicate what you want in return. If you take care of daddy, then daddy will take care of you. Simple age old concept of "you scratch my back and I will scratch yours."
1 Comment
erin mcclendon
This is so true. I just had my baby boy, but while i was pregnant I found myself being really tired and feeling unattractive. I am the lady in the streets and a super freak in the sheets for my man and that went away the last few months of mu pregnancy. Now that it’s over I can’t get enough… I’m definitely talking care of business and changing it up everyday.